Bad Day

I hate myself, my life and everything about me! I can't even function right now. I want to just explode. But instead Im just crying. I dont know why. I hate this. I want help and dont know where or how to get it.
Why am I here? Why do I have to go through this? Why do I have to suffer like this?
Why couldn't I just have a good childhood with good parents, people who love me and who would show me how to do things in life. How do deal with life. Its sooo damn hard trying to figure it all out on my own. With absolutely no help from anyone.
I dought anyone would miss me if I wasnt here.